Well well well, can I just say, this was a sweet memorable time that I like to look back on and think to myself, 'did I actually do enough? was I time conscious? All the things that I had wanted to do, did I get them done'? Time was so available for me back then and I know that when you reflect on this time period, it almost serves as a time capsule of infinite possibility too. It’s also counterproductive as we really don’t have a lot of time to think about life before babies as we could be spending our future time on completing certain tasks and set goals. So on that note, I’ll just get straight into it.
Life before babies makes you reflect more significantly on life with babies. Even as I write this to you, I want you to know that I am no rock star parent or renowned influencer. I am very much an ordinary first-time parent who is still figuring everything out. Not to my surprise, there is immense amounts of information out there; information pollution is probably a more suitable term that is fitting as information overload can be polluting to your own mind.
I for one felt this and I feel that you at a point may have also felt overloaded with all the books on parenting and raising babies too. Because of this, I turned to local knowledge aka advice from my parents and especially my mum. I turned to people I knew who had children and was very open minded to receiving any type of knowledge passed down. It was the quickest and most effective way for me to learn on the go whilst dealing and managing life on little to no sleep whilst looking after an unsettled newborn.
My son was born in a nearby hospital in our hometown of Melbourne, Victoria and he was born via emergency c-section. His heart rate had dropped significantly during contractions and was is dire stress or what they call a Category 1 – immediate threat to the life of the mother or baby. I remember prior to this moment; I had this feeling inside of me telling me he was stuck and couldn’t get out. I remember telling the nurses and doctors in the room that he was stuck, and that he can’t get out.
Motherly intuition was at work and it was the first moment where I had encountered an intuitive way of knowing things about my child before he had even been born. There are so many moments after this that us parents can relate to and just know what’s wrong with our babies without even being told. I can see you nodding and agreeing with this point. When we were in theatre; we heard a baby cry as my husband was near the right side of my head comforting me and didn’t know where it was coming from as we both couldn’t see passed the draped off area from my chest down which was where the abdominal surgery for the c-section was taking place.
We both thought it was a baby outside the room but much to our surprise it was the sound of our first-born son crying. He was born and it was that moment, my husband and I became true parents for the first time. It wasn’t until they had opened me up and realised the umbilical cord was blocking his passageway through my cervix therefore making him stuck and unable to get through. Had my son been in there any longer than he was, he made not have made it.
The main goal for this post is for you to connect with the essence of what it means to becoming parent. Even with my husband, he may not have birthed our son, but he was evidently present and part of this significant phase in our journey together. Life before becoming a parent was sweet but it doesn’t taste as rich as the moments we have now with our family.
1. Parenting allows greater discovery of your existence. Before I became a parent, I probably wouldn’t have been as passionate as I am now with my business which coincidently is about helping parents and children in their educational journeys.
2. Parenting brings out the OTT organiser in you as it makes you become incredibly organised and provides you with optimal project planning skills
3. Time becomes your most valuable currency. There is no room for drama, hour long phone calls with 20 plus friends in a work week, after work catch ups become questionable when your babies are at home waiting to spend time with you.
4. Your routine becomes more robust and every hour is purposefully filled
5. Your perseverance levels increase dramatically
6. Patience becomes illuminated within you and becomes one of your strongest and most honourable qualities
Photo: 2019: Mt Buffalo, Victoria, Family Camp trip